Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
