Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
