At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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