wake up i wanna do it froggy style
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Randomize