If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
