I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
