she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize