Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
