Nicole vs. Life
she smelled like a LAN party
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
