Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
