She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize
