you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
