you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
