break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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