do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
