hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
