glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize