There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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