I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize