The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
