Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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