On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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