Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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