It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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