It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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