if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize