Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
