I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
