i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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