Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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