There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
