To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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