i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
