fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
