Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
