His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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