okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
that is very illegal...i love you.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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