If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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