Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize