I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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