You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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