Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
