The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
