he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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