He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
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