I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
