Buhtt sex?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
