I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
where am i from again
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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