Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
