on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
