do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize